Jul 15, 2010

No Regrets, My Love.

There really isn’t much to complain about my life right now. It sucks. It really does. Especially NOW! But if I take time to look at it and ponder upon it, (which I did) I realize that maybe things happened for a reason. Yes, I extremely love my boyfriend. He showed me the world in ways I would have never seen it with my own eyes. He respects me and he loves me for who I am. Things for us has never really been easy. && now, it seems at this relationship is a sunken ship. But I understand. I used to cry each night, asking why is he giving up on me? Giving up on me when I never once given up on him. I see it now. I AM good enough for him. He knows that. But, I am just NOT GOOD for him. I am trouble. I spell problems. && maybe letting him go is the only way to show him how very much I love him. It hurts me, but he’s a great guy. So why do I want to hurt him? What happened on sunday night, I will never forget. The way his eyes hurt when he told me that he hates me. The way his muscles tense up at the slightest touch of my hand. His guilt, his pain. I can see it all. People may think I’m crazy, people may think I’m stupid. Maybe I am. But I know him a lot more than anyone ever took interest in. I know him && I know he loves me. Maybe as the days pass, the feelings he have for me will subside. But I know my feelings for him will not. He changed me. He gave me hope. He showed me love. And now I’ll do the same. I will pray for you everyday, my love. For your bright future, for your happiness, for your health. And maybe one day, we could be together. *But I won’t keep my hopes up high* :P Haha, I love you, S.

xoxo, ever yours,
Virginie Laurency.

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